How much effort should a person put into worrying about things that they do not have the power to change? How much effort should a person put into worrying about something they have the power to change, but no intention to do so? Why would anyone spend even a minute of their time worrying about such things? The answer is as simple as it is complicated and everyone reading this diatribe participates in the sport of worrying every day.
I should make clear that I do not consider planning ahead or considering possible outcomes as worrying. Those are things that need to be done to live a productive life. The difference between those things and worrying is that the former creates value in your life, and the latter does nothing and has even been reported as being bad for your health.
Over the years, I have started to pay attention and identify times that worry and stress seem to pop up in my life. I have done this in an attempt to minimize the time that I waste worrying. When I recognize myself getting stressed, I remind myself that any energy that I spend worrying or being stressed would be energy wasted. I try to find ways to improve the situation or probable outcome, or simply do all I can to set aside the worry and deal with the hand life has given me. Worrying about the cards in your hand does not improve the cards, it only takes away from your ability to turn them into the best hand possible.
I love to worry about stuff. I assume most of you reading this like to worry a little, even if you don’t like to admit it. I think it is only human to worry. It is easy to worry. It doesn’t take a lot of effort and there are no rules. All you have to do is fret about the future. Worrying doesn’t require you to resolve any problems, it just requires you to worry. Worrying is nothing more than a weight loss plan based on the idea that you can eat all you want and requires no physical activity. It seems like a great idea, but it will never help you lose weight.
Why do we like to worry? The thing about worrying is that, in addition to being easy, the act of worrying can make the worrier mistakenly believe they are actually doing something to resolve the problem. If I worry about more business coming in, I might feel better because at least I am thinking about it. The thing is, all the worry in the world does nothing about improving my cash flow if I do nothing else. Worry is a thief stealing my life minute by minute. If I know this, why do I worry? Because, it is so easy.
All this being said, I worry every day about all kinds of stupid things I cannot control. As I get older, I just try to minimize the time spent worrying. When an opportunity to worry presents itself, I try to identify ways I can improve the situation or simply accept the world as it is. The acceptance of things you cannot change is a short cut to peace.
I have no illusions that I will ever be able to live a worry free life. All I can do is remember to ask myself what I am worrying about and why would I want to waste my time doing it? I try to remember to ask myself these questions whenever I feel the desire to worry. It doesn’t always make me stop worrying, but it seems to help a little bit. Sometimes, a little bit of help is all you can ask for. That is true for everybody, especially those of us way up in the CHEAP SEATS!
Bill James is a co-founder of the James Law Firm with offices in Little Rock, Conway and Fayetteville, Arkansas. His primary area of practice is criminal defense. He can be contacted at Bill@JamesFirm.com