Once in college, I sent one of my roommates over the proverbial edge because I didn’t wipe the peanut butter off the knife after I made a sandwich.
At the time, I didn’t think it was a big deal. After all, what’s the big deal about making a sandwich and then throwing the knife into the sink?
In retrospect, I didn’t do the dishes very often back then. I guess the reason it wasn’t a big deal to me was because I didn’t clean up the mess. As relatively trivial as it was, my refusal to clean up after myself was causing my roommate emotional stress.
Even though the story does not place me in a positive light, I’ve always liked to relive it because it reminds me of what an idiot I was at that time in my life. It reminds me how thankful I am that I overcame the very precarious position my future was in at that time due to my failure to truly consider the ramifications of my actions and the things that came out of my mouth.
The other day, a similar situation came up in my home. I was brushing my teeth, and Patti sternly asked me to make sure I properly rinsed the sink when I was done. I told her I always did, and she quickly informed me that I was misinformed. She told me that the reason that I never noticed the problem was that she cleaned up after me every day.
When I was younger, I remember something from school or on television telling me that you should not let the water run while you brush your teeth. The goal, of course, was to save water. Something about that stuck with me, and I’ve always felt guilty about running the water while I brushed. Even though I saved water, I inadvertently put stress on Patti. She didn’t blow up like my roommate, but in some respect, history had repeated itself. I now do what I can to make sure all of the toothpaste is gone at the end.
I think there are two lessons we can take from these two little stories:
First, I think we can all agree that it’s only good manners to clean off the peanut butter knife and to properly dispose of your used toothpaste when you’re finished with it.
Second, we should do our best not to let little things fester until they cause us to lose our cool.
The interesting thing is that I was “wrong” in both cases. There’s really nothing good about that other than even though my very good friend and wife found certain things I did objectionable, they maintained their relationship with me in spite of my shortcomings. That’s certainly good for me.
Who are you irritating with your inconsideration? There’s no questioning they’re out there. If you don’t know who they are and what you’re doing to annoy then, start paying attention. If you do know who and what, stop immediately. It’s the right thing to do.
Doing the right thing is always good for everybody, especially those of us way up in the CHEAP SEATS!
Bill James is a co-founder of the James Law Firm with offices in Little Rock, Conway and Fayetteville, Arkansas. His primary area of practice is criminal defense. He can be contacted at Bill@JamesFirm.com