Well, the insanity continues.
On Tuesday, I got a call from KM’s big brother Bob, a.k.a. “Mother’s Favorite.”If you read last week’s column, you might remember that Bob had his first ever hole-in-one on Sept. 17, which was only five days after younger brother Bill, a.k.a. Sleepy Squirrel, had his first ever hole in one at his course down in Dallas.
So Bob calls me last Tuesday morning, saying, “You aren’t going to believe this.”
“What, you had another hole in one?”
“No, Hooper did. He just called me from West Memphis and just knocked one in the hole.”
“Oh, great,” was all I could come up with.
Hooper is Bill Hooper, a.k.a. Laverne, who married Kathy’s sister Patty. As a retired owner of an eastern Arkansas beer empire, Hooper, like the banker and the retired teacher, gets to play a lot of golf. So much in fact that this was not his first one hit wonder. I think he’s had six or seven.
So there it is, out of our regular fivesome, I am now the only one without the game’s most improbable shot. (Truth be told, a double eagle is more rare, but I’d still rather have a hole in one)
The fifth leg of our group is Dennis, a.k.a. Surly (the other half of Laverne and Surly), who, at age 70, I believe, has performed the unlikely feat a double digit number of times.
I asked Bob to tell me about his hole in one, which was during a scramble he was playing in at the Alotian Club. It happened on number 16, and after he hit the hybrid just the right distance, they watched as it rolled, and rolled, and rolled some more, to the hole where it disappeared.
The PGA golfer Rich Beem was at the event, and was playing two holes with each group. Beem, the 2002 PGA Tournament champion, walked up with his caddy as Bob and his group came to 17 green. “Who made the hole in one?” Beem asked.
“I did,” Bob told him. “It was my first one ever.”
The pro told him congratulations, and they asked him how many he’d had in his career. He told them 12, and one of those they all remembered.
It was the 2007 Nissan Open at Riviera, and after his ace, Beem threw down his club and jumped on top of the red Altima Coupe, right behind the tee, he’d won for making the shot.
Back to 18 tee box at Alotian, they all hit their drives, and Bob said he hit his best of the day, which stopped in the middle of the fairway just a few yards short of Beem’s ball.
“And you’ve only had one hole in one?” the pro asked.
Up at 18, on the Augusta-like, bikini waxed green, they had a long downhill putt for birdie. When Bob knocked it in, the Beemer just shook his head and mumbled, “Just one, huh?”
The next our fivesome will all be together will be at Blue Mountain Beach, where we’ll enjoy our annual Gulf Coast reunion and three days at the Regatta Bay golf course. It was there where, a few years ago, I knocked my second-shot stiff with a three-wood on the par five 18th. You may have heard about it – over the water, into a stiff wind, everything on the line.
No?
Oh, right, it has to be a hole-in-one before anybody pays any attention. Well, excuuuuuse me.
Our other brother-in-law, Mike from Atlanta, a.k.a. The Colonel, will join us there.
I wonder how many he’s had?
Update: Colonel Mike just informed me he in fact does have one, and even has a plaque to prove it – not that I would ever doubt the Army.
Jay Edwards is editor-in-chief of the Hamilton County Herald and an award-winning columnist.
Contact him at jedwards@dailydata.com