Editorial
Front Page - Friday, January 15, 2010
Are We There Yet?
Movie wars
Jay Edwards
The movie Kathy and I had chosen was “Up in the Air,” starring George Clooney and Vera Farmiga, who when she isn’t being a movie star hangs out with her husband in the Catskills breeding goats.
I told the clerk what we wanted to see and how many of us there were (that would be two, for better or worse, as they say). He looked down as he passed the tickets through the small opening at the bottom of the glass. I wondered if it were bulletproof. I wondered that, not because I wanted to rob them, but because of what Fred told me had happened to him at a movie in Fayetteville.
Fred had gone to see the movie “2012.” When he ordered his ticket the young guy behind the glass asked if he wanted to donate a dollar to St. Judes Children’s Hospital in Memphis. Fred being generous and a lover of children, said sure. That’s when the confusion began. Fred didn’t get the correct change, but after bringing it to the kid’s attention, they got it worked out.
Then Fred goes through the concession line, where he probably got the “$25.00 Huge Drink and Popcorn Special.”
He made his way into the dark theater and found a satisfactory seat.
He sat through the previews and the beginning of the feature, about 15 minutes worth. That’s when he saw someone coming up the aisle with a flashlight. He didn’t pay it much mind until the guy stopped at Fred’s row, pointed the light and him and said, “Sir, could you come with me.”
Fred said, “What?”
“I need you to come with me,” the guy said again.
Fred didn’t want to. The movie had barely begun and he didn’t want to miss anything. But the movie-guy kept insisting so he followed him out.
Once outside in the lobby Fred was met by a manager who told him that their, “cash drawer was short.”
“Well I’m sorry, but what’s that got to do with me?”
The manager informed Fred that the guy who had sold Fred the ticket said Fred had insisted on more change back after buying his ticket. “And now we’re short $10,” the manager told him.
Fred explained what had happened, but the manager seemed unconvinced and said, “We are still short $10.”
The lobby crowd grew larger and began to circle them.
Now Fred was irritated. “So let me get this straight. You’re saying that I came up with a scam to cheat your theatre out of 10 bucks?”
“Its been known to happen before,” came the not-too-bright reply.
Fred was escorted out of the theater.
The next day he received a call from one of the theater’s higher-ups in another city. The man said that after talking with the kid who had sold him the ticket, the story changed, and now he wanted to apologize to Fred for the mistake and ask him what he could do to make it right.
“I was embarrassed in front of many people by your employees before being kicked out of your theater, all because of a mistake your people made. I did nothing wrong. Not only that but they treated me like a criminal.”
The man again told Fred how sorry he was and asked what he could do. Fred sighed and paused.
“Free admission for a year and a cash settlement,” Fred told him.
Now there was silence from the other end.
“Well I think I can get the free tickets approved, but I don’t know about a cash settlement.”
“Have your lawyers call my lawyers,” Fred said before hanging up.
(I didn’t know Fred had one lawyer, much less lawyers. I’ll have to be nicer to him from now on.)
As for the outcome, I haven’t heard what they settled on.
It’s kind of like that Seinfeld episode where Kramer settles his case for unlimited coffee for life.
As for Kathy and me, we made it to our seats on the back row. (That’s the only place that no talkers or chair kickers can get behind you)
The movie was pretty good, or so I thought. I liked it better than Kathy, who gave it a C minus, while I gave it a solid B. She said she was distracted by the woman a few seats down from her with the bag of Skittles, who ate one at a time, rattling her bag with every bite.
There was also a guy somewhere down front who didn’t care for the movie much either, at least that’s the impression I got from his loud snores. Really, it was crazy.
If you theater managers are looking to harass someone else, why don’t you start with the bag rattlers and nap takers.
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