At the movies recently, I told the clerk what we wanted to see and how many of us there were (that would be two – for better or worse, as they say). He looked down as he passed the tickets through the small opening at the bottom of the glass. I wondered if it were bulletproof. I wondered that not because I wanted to do a stick-up, but because of what Fred told me had happened to him at a movie in Fayetteville recently.
When he ordered his ticket, the young guy behind the glass asked if he wanted to donate a dollar to St. Judes Children’s Hospital in Memphis. Fred being generous, said sure.
That’s when the confusion began. Fred didn’t get the correct change, but after bringing it to the kid’s attention, they got it worked out.
Then Fred goes through the concession line, where he probably got the “$25 Huge Drink and Popcorn Special.”
He made his way into the dark theatre and found a satisfactory seat.
He sat through the previews and the beginning of the feature – about 15 minutes worth. That’s when he saw someone coming up the aisle with a flashlight. He didn’t pay it much mind until the guy stopped at Fred’s row, pointed the light and him and said, “Sir, could you come with me.”
Fred said, “What?”
“I need you to come with me,” the guy says again.
Fred didn’t want to. The movie had barely begun and he didn’t want to miss anything. But the movie-guy kept insisting so he followed him out.
Once outside in the lobby, Fred was met by a manager who told him that their “cash drawer was short.”
“Well I’m sorry, but what’s that got to do with me?”
The manager informed Fred that the guy who had sold Fred the ticket said Fred had insisted on more change back after buying his ticket. “And now we’re short ten dollars,” the manager told him.
Fred explained what had happened, but the manager seemed unconvinced and said, “We are still short ten dollars.”
The lobby crowd grew larger and began to circle them.
Now Fred was irritated. “So let me get this straight. You’re saying that I came up with a scam to cheat your theatre out of ten bucks?”
“Its been known to happen before,” came the not too bright reply.
Fred was escorted out of the theatre.
The next day he received a call from one of the theatre’s higher-ups in another city. The man said that after talking with the kid who had sold him the ticket, the story changed, and now he wanted to apologize to Fred for the mistake and ask him what he could do to make it right.
“I was embarrassed in front of many people by your employees before being kicked out of your theatre, all because of a mistake your people made. I did nothing wrong. Not only that but they treated me like a criminal.”
The man again told Fred how sorry he was and asked what he could do. Fred sighed and paused.
“Free admission for a year and a cash settlement,” Fred told him.
Now there was silence from the other end.
“Well, I think I can get the free tickets approved, but I don’t know about a cash settlement.”
“Have your lawyers call my lawyers,” Fred said before hanging up.
(I didn’t know Fred had one lawyer, much less "lawyers." I’ll have to be nicer to him from now on.)
As for the outcome, I haven’t heard what they settled on.
It’s kind of like that "Seinfeld" episode where Kramer settles his case for unlimited coffee for life.
As for Kathy and me, we made it to our seats on the back row. (That’s the only place that no talkers or chair kickers can get behind you)
We were distracted by the woman a few seats down with a bag of Skittles, who ate one at a time, rattling her bag with every bite.
There was also a guy somewhere down front who didn’t care for the movie much either – at least that’s the impression I got from his loud snores.
If you theatre managers are looking to harass someone, why don’t you start with the bag rattlers and nap takers?